The Further Adventures of Moe and Joe: Consecration Sunday?

[This is the second Moe and Joe pure cornball skit I've written for our worship celebrations at Friendship Lutheran Church. Here is a link to the first one. It's the companion of this message.]

[As the scene starts, Joe is standing by himself, facing the congregation, scrunching his face as though trying to understand something or maybe, to see something in the distance.]

Moe: Hey, Joe.

Joe: [a bit impatiently, as though he’s being interrupted from doing something important] Oh...hey, Moe.

Moe: [looking in the direction toward which Joe is squinting] What are you looking at?

Joe: [still impatient] I’m not looking at anything.

Moe: Then, what are you doing? Did you have too much Skyline last night? I warned you about that.

Joe: [squinting harder] No! I’m concentrating!

Moe: Concentrating? Concentrating on what?

Joe: [gives up on the “concentrating” to look at Moe] I have no idea. But I just know that I’ve got to do it.

Moe: Why?

Joe: Because this is concentration Sunday.

Moe: No, Joe, it’s Consecration Sunday. Consecration.

Joe: Oh. That changes everything. It’s Consecration Sunday. [pauses] What does consecration mean, Moe?

Moe: I wondered the same thing myself. It does sound like one of those goofy words we only use at church. So, I looked it up. It comes from the word consecrate, which... [JOE INTERRUPTS WITH HIS LINE BELOW]

Joe: I remember that word! It’s in the Gettysburg Address. [goes into a mock-baritone speaking voice, as though imitating a speech-maker] “But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground.”

Moe: Right, Joe. And that speech was given at the dedication of the cemetery honoring all who lost their lives at the Battle of Gettysburg during the Civil War. To consecrate something means to dedicate it to some purpose.

Joe: So, what are we dedicating on Consecration Sunday?

Moe: We’re dedicating ourselves.

Joe: Hmmm. Dedicating ourselves. To what?

Moe: As nearly as I can tell, we’re going to dedicate ourselves or re-dedicate ourselves to one what and one whom.

Joe: Whom? What whom?

Moe: We’ll be dedicating ourselves to God. That’s the Whom. And we’ll also be dedicating ourselves to the mission of Friendship.

Joe: That sounds great, but how do we do that?

Moe: Well, at the end of the worship celebration, we’ll be asked to bring forward the time and talent surveys and the estimated giving cards we received in the mail.

Joe: So, we’ll dedicate our time, talents, and treasures to God and to the mission of the Church.

Moe: Hey, that’s good. [turn to the congregation and direct them to the PowerPoint] I think that we all should say it together, “On Consecration Sunday, we dedicate our time, talents, and treasures to God and to the mission of the Church.”

Joe: Hey, Moe. I have one more question.

Moe: What’s that?

Joe: Why can’t we just call it Dedication Sunday?

Moe: Oh, you know the pastor: He loves those goofy church words.

Joe: See ya, Moe.

Moe: See ya, Joe.